I am unbelievably saddened by the sudden passing of my dear friend, Tarik Pierce. I am still numb with shock and grief from learning of Tarik’s death, so please be patient with me as I try to collect some initial thoughts and provide some proper reflection on this incredibly loving, larger-than-life man. Tarik unexpectedly died today, July 6, of natural causes in the comfort of his home in Washington, DC. At 45 years young, he exuded an energy like he was 25 and lived every day to it’s fullest – I’m not being trite…he had the most socially active schedule out of anyone that I have ever met. While he has gone to his eternal rest, he leaves an indelible mark on the heart’s of everyone and anyone that has ever met him, especially among his family and the DC community. His most brilliant, joyous smile will always remain present in all of our hearts. He was the most positive, hospitable, and thoughtful person that I have known to date.
Our paths first crossed in 2008 when I had just moved to Washington, DC. He was one of the first people that I met when I arrived fresh-faced to the city. Like so many before and after me, Tarik’s hospitality would forever change my life. A social butterfly doesn’t begin to describe Tarik, since he was THE social butterfly…THE queen bee…THE legacy! As a newbie to DC, Tarik invited me to all the social activities that he routinely had scheduled each day (and he didn’t really differentiate between a weekday or a weekend day). Starting with a social workout at Results gym (now Vida), followed by a “small” brunch with at least 20+ of his closest friends, continuing to either a bar, fundraiser, or to play some sport, then another quick bite at local establishment on 17th Street, NW but now with 30+ of his newest closest friends, then depending on the day, a pregame at someone’s house or quick date, then back to end the night with dancing or some socializing…only to rest a few hours and repeat again. He was every where and known by all in the DC community. His most handsome face, cleanly faded haircut, and impeccable smile reflected his internal beauty and positivity.
His hospitality forever changed my life: I truly mean that too. If he hadn’t invited me to overwhelmingly tagalong with him, join his WAKA (and then Stonewall) kickball team, and enthusiastically promoted my dating potential, my DC experience would have been simply boring and uneventful. I’m grateful for his love, friendship, and thoughtful inclusion throughout these many, many years. My heart literally hurts for the absence moving forward. It especially hurts for his family, particularly his mother. He was a self-declared “momma’s boy” with all the admiration that it entailed. Just prior to his passing, Tarik was able to spend time with his actual family and his chosen family (which might be the largest family ever) in celebration of life and pride.
As the quintessential queen bee and living legacy of DC, Tarik’s daily presence will be noticed and sorely missed. The unimaginable grief and despair that so many people are experiencing with his death is beyond palpable. Involved in so many organizations and intertwined into personal lives of so many people, he plunged himself into everything and into every aspect…literally. As a natural leader, he promoted the good and sought the positive experiences of life. His leadership extends to numerous aspects of DC. To highlight just a few, he served as a captain for many social sports teams, most notably Stonewall Kickball’s Just the Tip. Last year, he had received outstanding lifetime achievement and recognition from the Capitol Pride Alliance for his efforts in promoting and living the goodness of acceptance and support for so many individuals in the DC LGBTQ+ community, which was a novel and important award for him personally. He excelled at everything, even in his professional work life.
He wasn’t just a great delegator of responsibility in his leadership roles, he was the head cheerleader. If his bright smile and laughter weren’t enough to pull you out of a rut through his innate sense that you weren’t having the best day, he would take a private moment to check-in and offer encouragement and sage advice. For example, he was fundamental to my social life and self-worth. After my first arrest, he was my personal advocate to the DC community. He demanded that I make my presence known by continuing to play kickball and socialize more with a new team. Yet, after my second arrest, like many, he was disappointed and frustrated with the mess that I caused. He shared that he didn’t fully understand what I was going through and that the optics were awful, but he resiliently helped me endure through his encouragement. He would routinely text (and even call) to let me know that he was thinking of me and asking if he could provide any assistance. My last text message from him just a week prior to coming to prison was a simple, “I love you” with smiley heart-eyes. He would randomly send these messages just to let me know that he was thinking of me…
He embraced the moment and didn’t let a day pass without a regret by seizing opportunity, albeit an opportunity to volunteer, to accept a leadership role in the community, to plan a fundraiser, to welcome another newbie into DC and make the city a better experience. Most notably, he annually volunteered for the Toys-for-Tots Pub Crawl fundraiser and would often seek out local DC organizations that would help assist the LGBTQ+ community, especially the youth. He loved everyone he met and certainly made it known.
Tarik’s presence imbued a genuine smile from his genuine heart. Tarik was diversity within diversity. He opened his heart and shared a smile with the young and old, the queer and straight, the cisgender and transitioning, the professional and struggling…he didn’t see color, race, or creed…he saw human and opportunity. The world is a bit dimmer without him here to brighten it and dignify each of us.
The loss of life is simply tragic. Three months prior to his own death, Tarik lost another close friend in the DC community, Wayne Owen. He was the first to break the news to Drew in order to tell me. Often these tragic moments cause us to hurt. Why does God allow the good ones to leave us early? Why does God call them home? When we are in these raw moments, it is difficult to process and understand the “Whys”? Yet, life is a mosaic. When we focus on just one piece or aspect of life, we may not be able to see and understand the great picture – the whole picture. In fact, Tarik ALWAYS captured every event, moment, and gathering with a group picture or selfie. I have a complete photo album that was already dedicated to him because the Apple Phone automatically recognized his face and created it. It is the largest photo album on my phone. As petty as it felt at the moment to take these pictures (which I despised), I am grateful to his pressure and Now is the time to celebrate Tarik: his life, his family and friends, his accomplishments, and his legacy.
During a brunch, gathering, or just any opportunity, Tarik would toast to how appreciative he was of everyone (typically the toast would be long and jumbled which indicated how overwhelmed with love and happiness he had for the moment). I am flooded with so many memories of these toasts and just the little hellos and hugs that Tarik expressed. His life lesson taught me to extend myself more by embracing others, staying positive, and telling those close to me that I love them by living every day, each moment to its fullness. I share in everyone who is grieving for Tarik and extend my deepest condolences to the Pierce family, his closest friends (especially Taylor), and to the entire DC community. Please remember to celebrate his life in your grief – he would especially have loved all this attention, honors, and tributes being paid to his astounding already enduring legacy. May God’s love and eternal reset be with our beloved Tarik…Until our paths cross again!